You Know You Love Me
by Just-Plain-Roo
Summary: Blair and Chuck setting each other straight on where they stand in their relationship. Set in the inevitable future, post Blair graduating from Yale. Fluff/Drabbles. Now a chapter fic.
1. Golddigga

"Bass! Care too explain what this," Blair held up a neon pink bow-tie in her hand. "Is doing mixed in with my _white_ silk sheets?" She demanded.

"You tell me, Waldorf." He smirked back at her. "And since when are they _your_ sheets? I thought that now that we were living together the whole 'what's mine is yours' thing would kick in?"

"Oh it's already in place," Blair assured him sweetly, throwing her arms around his neck. "Except you got some of the lines mixed up. It's 'what's yours is mine and what's mine is my own'. Get it?"

"Love you too babe." Chuck said sarcastically. "Remind me again who makes the money around here? For someone who's not a gold-digger you are surprisingly carefree about using my credit cards."

Blair's arms dropped to her sides. "Excuse me?" She asked dangerously. "So now I'm just some two-a-penny slut who's only interested in you for your money?"

"You said it, not me." Chuck restrained from laughing at the look on her face. Well, he attempted to anyway.

Her eyes hardened. "Fine. If that's what you think." She grabbed a pair of scissors.

"Waldorf what are you doing?" He asked warily. "Because if you're going to kill me you could at least have given me some notice."

Blair gave him a reassuring smile. "I'm not going to kill you. And even if I was I wouldn't do it with a scissors."

"You wouldn't?"

"Why of course not silly! I don't plan on killing you until at least after we get married." She said casually. "No, I'll give it a few months. Then after the honeymoon period runs it's course, I'll start dropping hints about you banging your secretary, then, one day when you least expect it, I'll subtly pour a little poison into your morning coffee and then after you croak it I'll plead the fifth and escape to Bermuda with all of your money and a fabulous new man."

"..."

"Chuck close your mouth, regardless of your name; the gaping fish look is very unbecoming on you." She told him brightly.

"We've been living together for less then a week and already you've signed my death warrant." He stated hoarsely. "You know what? I can't even say I'm surprised anymore."

She shrugged and took all of her credit cards out of her purse, she then raised the scissors, and then, with shaking hands and more then a few failed attempts, she snipped each one in half while her boyfriend watched on with a smirk on his face.

"You do know what you've just done?" Chuck asked her. "It will take at least a few days to get those reinstated, and you know that I only have my platinum card with me until the joint account is set up."

"I know." Blair told him, looking all wide eyed and innocent.

"So you've just given up all ability to shop and to eat out for the next few days? Don't you have that big shopping spree with Serena planned for later?"

"Yep." She made sure to pop the 'p' at the end of her sentence.

"And you are planning on doing what for money...?"

"Oh I'm sure I'll think of something." She winked at him before sauntering back to their bedroom. "After all, _golddiggers_ are very good at getting nice men to do them favors..."

"You're bluffing." He shook his head. "You wouldn't dare. B? Blair!"

*

*  
*

"Wait, am I hearing this right?" Serena laughed incredulously. "You voluntarily cut up all of your credit cards?"

"For the hundredth time, yes." Blair sighed exasperatedly. "Why is that so hard for everyone to believe?" She took one look at Serena's face. "On second thoughts, don't answer that."

"But what are you going to do?" Serena giggled. "I mean you can use mine if you want but-"

"And let that Basshole win?" Blair asked, looking completely aghast at the idea. "Never. I'll find a way. Don't you worry."

"I know that look B. What are you planning?" Serena looked concerned.

"You'll see."

*

*  
*

"What about that guy?" Serena asked. "He's cute, he's obviously wealthy, and he doesn't have a ring on his finger." She glanced at her best friend who was currently trying on a strapless, red satin dress. "Then again, with you dressed like that I don't think it'd matter either way."

Blair shot her a look. "That guy's ugly S. His hair is too short and too _blond_, he's too tall, and he has dimples. Dimples, Serena. Who the hell has them anymore?"

Serena put her hand to her mouth to stifle her laughter. "Blair, if I hadn't already known it before, this proves it. You are hopelessly devoted to Chuck Bass."

Blair's eyes widened. "I am, aren't I? Oh God. That's it. I'm going in." Blair deftly unzipped the back of the dress while adding a few extra tugs on the zip, and stepped out of the changing room and into the store. "Excuse me, sir?"

"Yes miss?"

"I was just wondering if you could help me with my dress? The zip, it wont go up and I can't find the shop assistant - Do you think...?"

Serena had to admire the way Blair's cheeks flushed with pink at the exact moments and her shy smile was expertly done. The girl was a born actress, she thought wryly.

"Sh*t." The man swore. "I think I broke the zip."

"What?" Blair cried, her eyes widening in despair. "But I need the dress for my friends gala the day after tomorrow!"

"Couldn't you buy it now and get it fixed before then?" The man looked so guilty that Blair had a sudden surge of conscious.

"No, I forgot my purse at home and I fly to Paris tonight." Blair explained patiently. "I was going to have the shop assistant fly it out for me but they won't possibly do it if I damaged it!"

"Well allow me to purchase it for you," The man offered graciously. "No, please, I insist." He pushed her towards the till and handed his credit card to the cashier amidst Blair's feeble protests.

"I can't possibly let you do this." Blair said weakly as he handed her the receipt. "You have to at least let me repay you. What's you name and telephone number? I'll ring you to reimburse you the second I get home."

"Really, there's no need." He smiled, "Although, I would be delighted to have a beautiful woman join me for lunch?"

Blair hesitated and put her hand on his arm. "I'd really love to join you, but I can't lie. I'm actually in a relationship right now."

"Of course you do," He looked faintly disappointed, but soon shook it off. "A pretty girl like you..."

"I just wanted to be honest." Blair said sincerely.

"Well surely your boyfriend wouldn't mind two friends having a little lunch?" He tried.

A wicked smirk came upon Blair's face. "I'm sure he'll be thrilled that I've made a new friend. I'll just go and get changed shall I?"

*

*  
*

"You called her a what?" Nate spluttered, in between bouts of laughter.

"I didn't call her anything," Chuck said, growing irritated at his best friend. "She called herself a golddigger, I just... Failed to correct her?"

"You realize that you're a dead man walking?" Nate was practically doubled over.

"Yes Nathaniel, I had realized." Chuck spat. "She wouldn't do anything stupid though, would she?"

"Nah," Nate waved the question off unconcernedly. "Blair doesn't have an adulteress bone in her body, most likely she'll just flirt with some guy to piss you off and get Serena to exaggerate the details."

Just then the door opened and Serena walked in, laden down with bags. Blair entered a few seconds later with one single bag clutched in her hand and a smug look on her face.

"Hey guys." She said cheerfully. "Want to see my new dress?" She held the red satin up to her chest for them to see, while Serena sat giggling in the corner.

"It's nice." Nate choked out, unable to meet any of them in the eye lest he start laughing again.

"Serena was very generous." Chuck told her, clearly relieved that she came home in one piece.

"Oh I didn't buy it for her." Serena assured him. "I ate lunch with Dan today."

"What?" Chuck asked tersely as Blair skipped into the bedroom to change into her new dress. "Who the hell bought it for her."

Serena shrugged mysteriously before collapsing on the sofa with Nate as Chuck stormed after Blair.

"Who bought you the damn dress?" Chuck demanded as his girlfriend examined her reflection in the mirror.

"It's cute isn't it? I mean aside from the torn zip, but I can get Dorota to run that up." Blair said thoughtfully.

"Blair!"

She finally turned to face him. "You know Chuck, I learned something today. I'm a pretty girl, and pretty girls are never lonely for long."

Chuck glared at her. "Don't even try it Waldorf. I know you would never cheat."

Blair smiled at him. "That's another thing I learned today – I would never want to. I'm happy, I like our apartment, I like that I get to wake up to you every morning and go to sleep with you every night. I like that I can drop in to see you at the office at any time, and eat lunch with you whenever I want..."

"So you're saying that me worrying my ass off all day was redundant because you are too comfortable to ever bother to stray?" Chuck asked in exasperation. "Couldn't you have just told me you loved me and made me apologize for being an asshole and left it at that?"

"Probably." Blair shrugged happily. "But what would be the fun in that?"

"...."


	2. Daddy's Girl

"Daddy!" Blair laughed, running towards Harold and nearly knocking him off his feet. "You're here! In my apartment, right now..." Some of her excitement subsided. "What are you doing here?"

"My daughter just graduated top of her class from Yale." Harold reminded her with a smile. "I think that calls for a visit. Where's Chuck? Usually he doesn't leave your side." He teased.

"Working. Again." Blair rolled her eyes in exasperation, flopping down on the sofa and patting the seat next to her for Harold to sit. "If I didn't know better, I'd swear he loved that stupid company more then he loves me."

"Stupid company?" Harold asked speculatively, looking pointedly around at the penthouse apartment furnished with luxurious fabrics and filled with expensive decor. "Blair Bear correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't it the income that Chuck gets from that same company that bought this place? _And_ everything in it?"

Blair raised her eyebrows but conceded the point. "I pay my own way! And he's a billionaire, he can afford it." She said defensively. "Lord knows he's not taking his money to the grave with him. Besides," She batted her eyelashes. "I'm worth it."

"Evidently he thinks so," Harold indicated the practically baseball sized diamond that graced the hollow of her neck. "If you're wearing _that_ as daywear."

Blair smiled and fingered the necklace. "He bought me this to apologize for calling me a golddigger."

"He called you a what?" Harold chuckled.

"Long story, but the important thing is that I won." Blair shrugged her shoulders. "As always."

*

*  
*

"Mr Waldorf." Chuck said in surprise, as he and Nate entered the apartment to find his girlfriend, his sister, and her father drinking martinis and laughing together. "I didn't know you were coming."

"Surprise visit." Harold explained as Serena kicked off her heels and Blair waved to the two of them.

"Hey Chuckie!" She said enthusiastically, almost falling over in her haste to get to them. "Whoops, I think I'm a little tipsy." She told Nate conspiratorially, before giggling loudly and dancing into Chuck's awaiting arms.

"You don't say," Chuck said dryly, looking at Harold accusingly.

"Maybe we went a little overboard on the gin?" Harold said apologetically.

"Just a tad." Nate laughed as Serena turned up the music and started to dance. Badly. Blair soon went and joined her.

The three men let out a collective wince as a stray limb met with Blair's one of a kind antique vase.

"She is going to be pissed in the morning," Chuck groaned, wrapping his arms around Blair and pulling her back onto the sofa with him. "She loved that damn thing."

"Hello?" Dan Humphrey's voice called from the doorway. "Serena?"

"Great, just what I need right now." Chuck muttered.

"In here." Nate called, giving his best friend a warning look.

Dan walked into the room, his eyes widening as he took in the sight of his on-again/off-again girlfriend dancing to an old Spice Girl's track. "Okay..."

"Dan!" Serena shrieked, "Come dance with me!"

"I'll go run the shower." Nate volunteered, watching in amusement as Chuck struggled with Blair on the sofa and Dan found himself coerced into dancing with the blond beauty. Harold was standing to the side and looking completely out of his depth.

"Daddy!" Blair pouted, finally prying herself away from her boyfriend and deciding to latch onto her father instead. "I don't feel so good."

"Maybe we should get her some penicillin?" Harold suggested.

Chuck shook his head. "It doesn't react well with the alcohol. It will make her feel better now but she'll have a killer hangover in the morning." He looked Harold in the eye. "The last time she had a hangover she threw a glass at Eric."

"I did not!" Blair protested, before thinking about it. "Actually, wait. Yeah I did. But he was breathing too loudly and his fake blond hair was too bright!"

"Okay shower time," Nate decided, helping Chuck lead her to the bathroom and quickly leaving the room again.

"A little help here?" Dan asked weakly, "Serena is surprisingly strong for a girl."

"Maybe _you're_ just weak." Serena giggled, allowing Nate to lead her to the awaiting Chuck.

A few minutes later Nate re-entered the room laughing. "Have I mentioned that I love drunk Serena?"

"Oh yeah the flailing limbs and stench of alcohol is really attractive." Dan said sarcastically. "Not to mention the insults. Speaking of which, Blair must really be drunk if she's allowing me to step foot in her precious apartment."

"I was here the day they moved in, Blair tried to make me wear rubber gloves." Nate told them. Harold shook his head and laughed while Dan didn't appear fazed.

"Honestly I can't blame her." Dan shook his head. "Have you seen some of this stuff?" He pointed out a painting on the wall. "I swear that is a Van Gogh print."

"Original actually." Blair's voice corrected snappily from the doorway, she was now clutching her head and wearing a pink velour tracksuit. "I bought it for Chuck last Christmas."

Dan's mouth gaped open.

"Humphrey come and sort out your girlfriend." Chuck demanded, wringing out his sweater. "She's getting water all over my bathroom floor. And me."

"Brotherly love." Blair snarked, downing an iced cappuccino.

"Blair are you feeling better?" Harold asked concernedly.

Blair nodded mutely. "I am never drinking again." She finished the last of her caffeine hit.

"Uh huh," Chuck said in a bored tone of voice. "Just remember, when you wake up tomorrow morning and your head is killing you; Chuck is not to blame. Blair's intolerance of alcohol is."

The glass very nearly hit his head.

*

*  
*

"Goodbye Daddy," Blair said cheerfully two days later, pecking Harold on the cheek.

"Goodbye Blair Bear, goodbye Chuck." Harold smiled. "I'll see you both in France this summer?"

"Only if you promise to hide the booze." Chuck muttered under his breath before wincing when Blair's stiletto met with Chuck's toe.

"And you're sure you don't want a ride to the airport?" Blair continued.

"I'll be fine. You worry too much." Harold assured her.

Blair rolled her eyes before handing him his bag. Her gaze then fell on the empty spot on her coffee table. "Where the hell is my vase!?"

"On second thoughts who wants to wait for summer?" Chuck laughed nervously. "Let's go now." He ushered Harold out of the door ahead of him. "Quickly, before she realizes."

"BASS!"


	3. Perverted Old Codgers

"Chu-uck!" Blair whined sleepily, pulling on the blankets that her boyfriend had entangled himself in. "Move."

He snored in response. Blair tried pushing him but soon gave up upon realizing that he was more then double her size.

She huffed before grabbing as much of the blankets as possible and rolling over. She had just closed her eyes and began to drift off again when Chuck subconsciously pulled the blankets away from her again.

Narrowing her eyes and gritting her teeth, Blair fought back. Unfortunately for her Chuck was stronger, and he had the added advantage of not being fatigued and sleep deprived. He gave one almighty pull, causing Blair who had wrapped herself around one corner of the comforter to go flying, Literally.

"Ah!" Blair screeched as he body met with the cold wooden flooring. The 'thud' caused Chuck to finally awaken.

"Blair?" He blinked slowly, "What are you doing down there?"

Blair gave him the strongest death glare that she could muster up, before painfully getting to her feet and grabbing her pillow. "I want a divorce." She hissed furiously.

"We're not married." Chuck said confusedly, rubbing his face with his hands and sitting up straighter on the bed.

This realization made Blair angrier. "That is besides the point!"She spluttered, before storming off to go and sleep in the spare room.

Chuck shook his head and had just laid down to go back to sleep again a few minutes later, when a pillow came out of nowhere and smacked him in the face.

"Payback is a bitch." His beloved girlfriend spat reappearing in the doorway for a second before quickly retreating again.

"Love you!" Chuck called sardonically after her.

*

*  
*

"Blair," Chuck sidled up to her as she was about to get into the shower the next morning. "You know how I promised we'd have a quiet night in tonight?"

"Yeah," Blair replied warily, folding her arms across her chest.

"Well Murphy just rang me. One of the shareholders is hosting a dinner-dance this evening. I can't not go Blair. I'm sorry." He told her.

Blair sighed, "You promised Chuck. You said it would just be you and me."

"I know," Chuck said resignedly. "If it makes you feel better I already know that I won't have fun."

"Why?"

"'Cause you won't be there." He said smoothly. "No, actually all of the board members are over fifty, and their wives look double that. I'll be the youngest man there. Guaranteed I'll be the only one there under forty."

"Woe is you," Blair rolled her eyes, "I guess it's just me, Audrey and Cary then." She stepped into the shower but left the door slightly ajar so that she could still talk to Chuck. "Goody."

"You could always come with me," Chuck pointed out as he brushed his teeth. "Like I said, it'll be a snooze fest, but at least you won't be stuck here watching old movies and eating popcorn on your own."

"So instead I'll be meeting the generation of people who were most likely in their thirty's when said old movies came out?" Blair laughed.

"Now I think that's stretching it a bit," Chuck smiled, "But yeah, pretty much."

Blair snorted.

"Besides," He continued with almost to much ease, "It wouldn't do any harm for you to meet some of the people who are involved in the company. After all, I can't have the trustees thinking the girl I'm going to marry is some mindless floozy..."

The water switched off and Blair stepped out with a towel wrapped around herself. "On second thoughts, I think I have the perfect dress for the occasion. It'd be a shame to waste it." She said nonchalantly.

Both pretended that they didn't notice the beaming smile that was on the others' face.

*

*  
*

"When you said that you had the perfect dress I did not think that you meant that." Chuck muttered as he placed a hand against her bare back and led her into the ballroom.

"I don't see what the problem is," Blair said serenely. "My dress is more then appropriate."

"It's backless," He hissed. "And the two spaghetti string straps that tie around your neck aren't doing much either." He pointedly ignored all the stares that they were getting and the amount of old codgers whose eyes were transfixed on Blair. "Are you trying to give people heart attacks?"

"Half of the ladies here are dressed in less then I am." Blair pointed out patiently, waving and smiling at a group of people. "Nobody cares about them."

"It's not the dress Waldorf, it's who's in it." Chuck smiled through gritted teeth as one of the younger executives openly leered at Blair. "With those old biddies it's hard to tell where there skin starts and where the wrinkles begin. Unlike you," His fingertips grazed over her milky skin causing a shiver to run down her spine.

"I'll fake a cold and put on your jacket later." Blair conceded as Chuck handed her a Cosmopolitan while taking a scotch for himself.

"Until then you'd better keep the paramedics on speed dial." She let out an over exaggerated yawn and stretched her arms out, purposely letting the material of her dress pull taut around her stomach and bust. "Might as well give them one last thrill before they croak it."

A glass or two were clearly heard shattering in the distance.


	4. Secrets

Chuck yawned and rolled his eyes as he saw Blair curled up on the sofa watching Saturday morning cartoons. "Don't say it," She warned, as he came up behind her and rested his elbows on the back of the seat cushion.

"You know if I were to tell anyone that Blair Waldorf enjoys watching old re-runs of ancient kids programs they would never believe me." Chuck smirked.

"Just like nobody would ever believe me if I told them that it was your generous contributions to ABC that kept Grey's Anatomy running for an extra three seasons. Or that the box marked Playboys in your closet is actually home to all eight seasons." Blair retorted.

Chuck acknowledged the truth in that as he came and sat next to her. She lay her head on his chest and he kissed the top of her head. "Agree to never tell?"

"Agreed."

*

*  
*

"Blair!" Serena shrieked, storming into the apartment. "Blair!"

"What?" Blair demanded, rushing out of her bedroom dressed only in a robe. "What is it? Are you okay?"

"No!" Serena cried, "I mean yes, I mean I don't know!"

"Sweetie you need to calm down and tell me what's wrong." Blair wrapped her arm around her best friend's shoulders and leading her to sit down.

"Is Chuck here?" Serena asked a few seconds later, concentrating on keeping her breathing even.

"No. He's with Nate, they'll be gone all day." Blair assured her.

Serena nodded and rummaged around in her oversized handbag for something. When she finally found what she was looking for she silently handed the open box to Blair.

Blair's eyes widened and her hand flew up to her mouth.

"Help me." Serena pleaded.

*

*  
*

"Hey Babe," Chuck called as he entered the kitchen and tossed his keys down on the table. He smiled as he saw the pink, perfumed, sticky-note taped to the fridge. "Out with S, be back soon. Love you, Blair." He read aloud as he poured himself a glass of orange juice.

He rattled the empty carton and made a mental note to buy more before Blair threw a fit. Or at least tell the maid to.

As he went to throw it in the bin he noticed a small pink rectangular box peeking out of the top. He reached down and picked it up just as the elevator dinged and Blair appeared behind him.

"Sorry, I thought I'd be back earlier but Serena needed me for something." Blair took off her coat and scarf before turning to her boyfriend. "Chuck?"

He turned to face her, still holding the box. "A pregnancy test. You're pregnant?" He asked hoarsely.

Blair's face paled. "Where did you find that? What you snoop through the bins now?" She snapped, purposely moving away from him.

"Blair," He grabbed her arm and spun her around again. "Tell me. Was it positive?" His dark eyes searched hers, his face earnest and pleading.

She nodded mutely. "Not me... Serena." She said brokenly as his arms reached around to envelope her. "She made me promise not to tell. She's terrified."

He just mumbled that he loved her into her hair.

"Chuck?" Blair said hesitantly as they lay in bed later that night.

"Hmm?" He replied.

"If the test was mine... Would it really be so bad?"

Chuck sighed, "We're only twenty-three Blair."

"I know." She said quietly, burying her face into his chest as her breathing slowed and her eyes closed.

Chuck's eyes traveled from the tiny brunette in his arms, to the framed photo of his mother that Blair had made certain to have adorning their bedside table, and back again. "No, Blair. It wouldn't be so bad." He tightened his grip around her as he shut his eyes.


	5. Babies & Billionaires

"I can't believe you're going to have a baby." Eric shook his head, "It's... _weird_."

He was accosted by glares from both expectant parents.

"So have you broke the news to Lily yet?" Blair asked conversationally.

"Since we're not hearing howls of injustice and shrieks of anguish from the other side of town, I'd hazard a guess _not_." Chuck smirked.

Serena groaned and her hand immediately flew towards Jenny's vodka-tonic, only to be stopped last minute and replaced by her own strictly non-alcoholic tonic water. "Accident?" She ventured as Dan gave her a reproving look.

"Uh huh."

Blair laughed and with a wink at Serena she slowly raised her own glass to her lips and took a tantalizing sip.

"I. Hate. You." Serena ground out.

"Don't worry sis," Eric smirked. "Only nine more months to go."

.

.

.

.

"Remind me again why we're here?" Chuck muttered as they sat in the middle of the table. Serena and Dan had just broken the news in front of the Van der Woodson-Bass-Humphreys. Needless to say conversation was more then a little stilted.

"Because Serena is technically your sister and Lily likes to have you, and consequently me, over for family dinners." Blair said through gritted teeth. "Thanks for that by the way."

"No problem." He snarked back.

"So... How about that weather we've been having? Gotta love the sun." Eric tried.

Chuck stifled a snicker and Blair looked appalled. "You did not just use the weather as an ice-breaker."

"Hey did I mention that an associate of Stefano Gabbana called me last week?" Jenny asked, "Apparently he's seen my work and wants to offer me a job for when I finish college. Isn't that amazing?"

"Riveting." Blair said dryly.

"Blair," Serena warned. "Play nice."

"I- I don't understand..." Lily said finally. "How could this have happened?"

Chuck smirked and opened his mouth, "Lily, when a man and a woman-"

"Chuck!" Serena gasped. "Shut up!"

"Dad, say something." Dan urged pleadingly.

Rufus sat in shock, "What can I say?" Rufus shrugged emptily, "You two made a decision and now you are living with the consequences."

"I'd hardly call our unborn grandchild a consequence Rufus," Lily snapped at her husband.

"Well what do you expect me to do?" Rufus retorted, "Throw a ticker tape parade? Invite all our friends and family to gush over the fact that our unmarried, just-out-of-college children are going to have a child themselves?" Rufus stood up and brought his plate to the sink with a loud clatter.

"I always thought it would be Jenny first." Eric mused.

"Excuse me?" Jenny's eyes widened.

"He just called you a slut," Blair supplied.

"Stay out of this Waldorf." Dan demanded.

"Oh chill out, Humphrey." Chuck rolled his eyes.

"Everybody quiet!" Lily raised her voice and the room fell silent. Lily then glared pointedly at Eric until he took his headphones out of his ears and turned the volume on his music player down from maximum to minimum. When she was certain she had everyone's attention she then took a deep breath and began, "Serena, Dan, both of you know that I am in full support of anything that you decide to do, be it marriage or not, and I'm sure that Rufus agrees."

Rufus let out a snort before reluctantly nodding. "However, should you decide to get married. It would be of monumental help to me if you did so before the baby is born. Lord knows I don't want to listen to Cece's moaning more then is strictly necessary." Lily sighed.

"Well," Dan said hesitantly, taking Serena's hand in his. "We were thinking of maybe having a small registry office get together..."

Blair choked on her her drink, "WHAT!" She exclaimed when she finally got her breath back.

"Registry Office." Serena repeated firmly as Lily tried to surreptitiously fan herself with her napkin.

"Mother is going to have an aneurysm." She muttered, smiling faintly as Eric -her favorite child- patted her consolingly on the back.

Blair fixed her best friend with a stony glare. "If you think that I am stepping foot in some crappy public chapel you have another thing coming."

"That's one person off the guest list then," Rufus smiled, considerably more cheerful.

.

.

.

.

"I thought the point of having a low-key wedding, was to have it low-key." Vanessa said disparagingly, as Lily marched them into the top bridal shop on Madison Avenue.

Blair snorted as the shop assistant hurried over to help.

"We need a bridal gown, and three bridesmaid dresses." Lily said brusquely. "Oh, and something to make the mother of the bride look more like the _sister _of the bride."

The assistant simpered happily. "Now, who is the blushing bride?" Her eyes skimmed over Lily, Serena, Blair and Jenny who were all impeccably dressed, before finally resting on Vanessa, who was currently dressed in a neon orange pinafore with bright pink combat boots and was turning her nose up at wads of white chiffon. "First timer?" She asked sympathetically.

"Think pretty woman," Blair advised before wincing as Vanessa knocked over a hat stand. "Or Miss Congeniality."

"Miss Congeniality it is," The assistant nodded sagely.

.

.

.

.

"Tell me again why we didn't just get Blair's mom or Jenny to do the dresses?" Vanessa asked as they perused the shelves a few minutes later. "I mean have you seen the price of some of these?"

"Eleanor and Cyrus are on their second honeymoon and I wouldn't have enough time to do all of these from scratch." Jenny told her. "Plus there's the tuxes."

"Don't worry, Charles has already ordered those in from Paris." Lily said, "I thought it best to let him take care of things seeing as he is the most fashion conscious of all of us."

Serena giggled and Blair smiled fondly.

"Holy Crap!" Vanessa held up one of the price tags and her mouth gaped open.

"Hey V, you're in the wrong section." Serena called from across the room, "That's the returns pile."

"I'm in Hell." Vanessa groaned.

"I'm in Heaven!" Jenny squealed, eagerly picking a lavender dress off of the rack.

"Do you know how many children you could feed with the value of this dress alone?" Vanessa held up a plain pink bridesmaid dress.

Blair let out a sigh of frustration. "If I call my accountant and get him to donate a few thousand to 'Save the Whales' or something equally as idiotic, will you please _shut_ _up_?"

"I really need to get me a billionaire." Jenny sighed wistfully as she replaced the dress and listened to Blair and Vanessa bickering over the 'value of a dollar'.


	6. Fugly Biatches

"Thank God they're finally gone!" Blair let out a sigh of relief as she kicked off her heels and pulled her hair down from it's stiff up-do.

"Why does everyone always choose here to congregate?" Chuck muttered, loosening his tie. "Don't they have houses of their own?"

"Evidently not," Blair agreed, turning up her nose at the scarce remains of her refrigerator. "I swear, every time Serena comes over she cleans us out. She's like a bottomless pit."

Chuck snorted and threw his cell to her. "Chinese or Indian?"

"Actually I'm kind of in the mood for Italian," Blair mused, dialing the number and putting in their order. "I can't wait until Dorota gets back." She sighed wistfully as she sat down next to Chuck. "She makes the best ravioli."

Chuck rolled his eyes, "Maybe, but she never fails to put me off it by lecturing us on sex and marriage. I think I'm actually starting to miss the lectures on 'God is always watching'."

"It's withdrawal." Blair told him with a smirk. "It passes. I went through the same thing when Eleanor finally stopped criticizing me."

"There's nothing she could possibly criticize Blair." Chuck told her sternly. "Eleanor knows that."

Blair smiled, and nodded. "Though I'd say that her change of heart had more to do with you subtly dropping hints about 'dementia' and 'nursing homes' then her desire to show me how much I mean to her."

"I still have those brochures for Everview Green..." Chuck said hopefully.

"The one in Wisconsin?" Blair giggled. "I think she'd drop dead on the spot."

"All the more reason to suggest it."

.

.

.

.

"So what do you want to do today?" Blair asked Chuck cheerfully the next morning.

"We could always stay in bed all day," Chuck winked, before hastily adding upon Blair's glare, "Or we could, you know, go to the park?"

Blair rolled her eyes at his obvious lack of enthusiasm before thoughtfully flipping through her closer for inspiration. "We could go ice-skating," She suggested, while holding her pink and white winter dress with matching skates against her body.

"It's October," Chuck told her, "There will be plenty of time to drag me into the freezing cold in a few months."

Blair pouted before replacing the outfit. "Sight-seeing?" She held up a floaty blue dress and an oversized handbag.

"We live in New York City and it's rush hour." Chuck flipped through his newspaper nonchalantly.

"Scouting out possible investors for Bass Industries?" Fire red silk with navy blue accents.

"I thought you wanted to have fun."

"A nice walk around the Gardens?" White muslin with red silk roses and a large straw hat.

"I'd end up ravishing you among the flower beds, consequently getting us kicked out." Chuck paused. "Again."

Blair flushed guiltily and didn't reply. She finally pulled out her her new navy silk dress with the short puffy skirt and her opaque red heels. Without consulting Chuck she quickly got dressed and modeled the completed outfit for his inspection. "Lunch at the Tribeca followed by an afternoon of shopping before returning back home for dinner and a quiet evening in." She said firmly, as he smiled and took her outstretched hand.

"Sounds like a plan Waldorf." Chuck agreed as he changed his bow-tie and pocket square to match her dress. "But we both know that the quiet evening in isn't going to be feasible."

"Oh?"

"Whenever we are in the apartment alone together - and I use the term _alone_ very loosely because yes I do remember that one time in New Haven last year with Eleanor and Lily in the other room - you seem to have quite a bit of trouble staying quiet. In fact I would even go as far as to say that you have to really work to keep your utterances down to a low scream." Chuck smirked.

Blair glowered. "I hate you."

He chuckled before taking her hand in his and leading her to the elevator.

.

.

.

.

"I have to go to the toilet." Blair excused herself as Chuck talked business with one of his executive friends. He gave her an apologetic look and she gave him a reassuring smile. She was used to having either one of them accosted by colleagues on outings. It came from being the CEO of a major company in Chuck's case, or from running a top fashion house in hers.

They were far too successful for their own good.

As she flushed the toilet and washed her hands in the extravagant cubicle she heard voices carrying from outside, her hand was just on the lock when she heard her name mentioned. She creaked the door open slightly, enough to see three women in their early thirties gathered around the mirrors fixing their make up.

"Honestly though, did you see what she's wearing?" the first woman remarked.

"I know! That dress is so last season and as for those heels... I've seen hookers wearing lower stilettos." the second said scornfully.

"She still manages to look drop dead gorgeous though. I'd kill for her figure." The third voice said wistfully, applying another think layer of concealer on top of the blemishes that were very prominent on her pale, horselike face.

"Her figure?" the second tittered. "It's the boyfriend I want. Do you see the way he looks at her?"

"Like she's the only woman in the world." the third sighed. "I heard that they were high school sweethearts, you know."

"She's only with him for the money." the first sniped.

"But she's _Blair_ _Waldorf_. As in Eleanor Waldorf's daughter." the third said meaningfully. "I don't think she needs the money."

Blair smirked before pushing the door the remainder of the way open and stepping out confidently. "Marissa Jenkins, Lucy Evans, and Gertrude Dale." She said with satisfaction as she fixed her curls in the mirror and reapplied her lipstick. "I believe my boyfriend has invited you and your husbands to sit with us." The three ladies paled as Blair smacked her lips and gathered her purse together again. "I guess I'll see you girls outside." Giving them a small wave and a skillful arch of her eyebrows she exited the bathroom with her infamous style and grace.

Those catty bitches were right about one thing, Blair thought as she sat down next to her boyfriend, I _am_ Blair Waldorf. Chuck put his hand on her knee and she placed her hand on top of his and squeezed gently. He smiled at her.

And to Chuck she was the only woman in the world. The only woman of any importance, anyway.


	7. Future Heir of Dynasties Oh Shit!

"Mom?" Blair asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes and tying her robe loosely over her slip. "What are you doing here? Why aren't you and Cyrus in Milan? Did something happen?"

Eleanor turned too face her with a distraught look on her face. "This Blair," She held up a magazine clipping and handed it to Blair. "Is why I am here."

"'New York Socialite Expecting Baby'," Blair read. "Oh so you've heard."

"Heard? Read, is more like it. Were you ever planning on telling me?" Eleanor demanded.

"Sure, I just didn't think it was worth interrupting your vacation for." Blair shrugged nonchalantly.

"How can you just stand there and be so flippant!" Eleanor took a deep breath and pinched the end of her nose. "Blair, darling, this is a _baby_. I don't think you quite understand the seriousness of the situation."

"Eleanor?" Chuck asked in surprise as he came in search of his girlfriend.

"Charles," Eleanor said stiffly, giving him a look akin to pure loathing.

Chuck blinked and gave Blair a questioning glance.

"I am a strong believer in marriage." Eleanor continued, giving both of them piercing gazes. "I believe that it is a fundamental step in any relationship. Especially those who are to have any chance of lasting."

Blair narrowed her eyes. "Mom where are you going with this?"

"Blair in the social circles that we keep, certain things are expected." Eleanor said as tactfully as she could while still glaring at Chuck who was beginning to get slightly unnerved. "Marriage always comes before children, not after. I taught you that."

"Well obviously no one taught Humphrey," Chuck smirked as he poured himself a cup of coffee, resisting the urge to put alcohol in it in front of Blair's mother, even though it was Blair's mother who made him feel like he might need it.

"Humphrey?" Eleanor echoed hollowly. "You mean it's not even his!" Eleanor jerked a finger towards Chuck while looking incredulously at her daughter.

Chuck's eyes widened upon realization and he started laughing.

Blair's eyebrow's furrowed in consternation as Eleanor started muttering things under her breath and ranting about reputations, and as Chuck's chest heaved with badly suppressed laughter.

"Will someone please explain what the hell is going on!"

Chuck stopped laughing long enough to take a few deep breaths. "She... She thinks that _you're_ pregnant." The effort became too much for him and he collapsed again.

"WHAT!" Blair shrieked. "Mom I am not pregnant!" She said firmly.

"But the paper--"

"_Serena_ is pregnant." Blair told her. "Not me."

"But you said something about a Humphrey...?" Eleanor asked.

"_Dan_ Humphrey! As in Serena's longtime Brooklyn boyfriend." Blair reminded her before pausing, "Wait... what did _you_ think I meant?"

"Well... that you... I mean that he... got you-" Eleanor spluttered.

Blair mouth dropped open and her eyes almost popped out of their sockets. "Dan Humphrey?" She repeated furiously. "Dan Humphrey? You thought that I was pregnant and DAN-FREAKING-HUMPHREY was the father?"

Chuck sniggered again as Eleanor flushed.

"Well what was I supposed to think?" Eleanor defended.

Blair just shook her head and glared at her boyfriend. "How exactly is this funny?"

"After all the lectures dear Eleanor has given me about cheating on you," Chuck said in amusement, "She accuses _you_ of having a love affair with Humpty-Dumpty."

Blair rolled her eyes and re-focused her glare on her mother.

"So it's not you that's pregnant?" Eleanor checked. "You're positive?"

"Actually she's negative," Chuck supplied. "Serena's positive."

Blair lovingly elbowed him in the stomach.

Eleanor gave him a withering glare before turning to her daughter with a reproving look. "Why not?"

"Why not what, Mom?" Blair asked tiredly.

"Why aren't you pregnant?" Eleanor brushed some stray lint off of her tailored jacket. "I'm not going to live forever—"

"_Thank_ _God_." Chuck muttered just loud enough for both women to hear him. He was expecting another elbow, and by the haughty look on Eleanor's face so was she, but it never came. Blair just examined her nails unconcernedly. Eleanor bristled.

"--and I want to see my Grandchildren grow up first." Eleanor finished. "You might be a little less selfish seeing as you are my only child."

The look of shock on both of the couple's faces was almost comical. Not that Eleanor was laughing, no, that would ruin her latest botox injection.

"Doesn't whats-his-face have a kid?" Chuck frowned after a few seconds silence. "Cyrus' son?"

"_Aaron_, does indeed have a son." Eleanor seemed reluctant to broach the subject, something that Chuck was all to quick to pick up on.

"What age is he?" Chuck asked innocently.

"Lassie is almost three now." Eleanor said with a pained expression. "His mother, _Candy_, named him." She continued.

"Sounds like some stripper's name." Blair snorted.

Eleanor remained stoic and silent.

"Oh my God she is, isn't she?" Blair giggled. "The great Eleanor Waldorf has a daughter-in-law named Candy the stripper - Sorry, _female entertainer_ - and a grandson named Lassie. Lassie, as in the dog."

"Your boyfriend prefers to go by the name _Chuck_ and takes great pleasure in parading around in pink pastel suits." Eleanor retorted. "Which of us is worse off?"

With one last haughty sniff, Eleanor mustered up the remains of her dignity and turned on her heel.

The second the elevator door closed Blair and Chuck turned to each other with somber expressions.

"If we ever have kids--" Chuck began.

"When." Blair corrected, folding her arms across her chest.

"--_when_ we have kids, we are moving as far away from New York as is possible." Chuck said seriously.

Blair nodded in agreement.

"You're an only child, and I doubt Lily will want to acknowledge Serena and Dan's mutant spawn when it moves to Brooklyn and becomes an ax-murderer. Jenny has sworn against having kids until she's at least forty. Eric is _gay_, so the chances of him reproducing are slim to none..."

"Our kids will be the only heirs to both the Waldorf-Rose _and_ Van der Woodson dynasties." Blair groaned.

"Shit."

"You said it Bass."


	8. Viva Las Vegas

"Serena!" Blair squealed, rushing forward to envelope the taller blond in a tight hug. "You're back! How was Hudson?"

"O- Okay, Dan's Mom took the news pretty well." Serena said. "But that's not why I'm here. B, I need your help."

"What's wrong?" Blair asked concernedly, "Is the baby all right?"

"The baby's fine," Serena nodded, "I went for a check up a few days ago and the doctor said I was about two months along. That's not the problem."

"Then what is?"

"The wedding." Serena blurted out. "I can't marry Dan."

Blair let out a sigh of relief. "Oh thank God, it's just cold feet. You really had me going there for a second. S, you and Dan love each other. You shouldn't be nervous."

"No, no, Blair, it's not that I don't _want_ to marry Dan – because I do. I really do – it's that I _can't_ marry Dan." Serena said shakily.

"Well why not?" Blair frowned.

"Because I'm already married."

**--**

"Blair could you keep it down," Serena hissed, "I don't want Chuck to find out what we're doing."

"You and me both Blondie." Blair retorted. "_Two months_ Serena, you got engaged two whole months ago, you're getting married in three months and you choose now to spring this on me!"

"I was scared!" Serena defended. "And I could never catch you on your own, you were always with Chuck."

"Well we do live together," Blair reminded her. "You know, as all of us _non-bigamists_ do."

"Okay, I get it. I should have told you." Serena sighed and put her head into her hands. "But you would have done the exact same thing if you were me."

"Except this would never happen to _me_, Serena." Blair snorted. "Things like this could only ever happen to you."

Serena groaned. "What do I do Blair? How can I possibly explain this to Dan?"

Blair rubbed her back comfortingly before focusing again on the laptop screen that was in front of her. "Las Vegas, Nevada. Home of sex, drugs and rock n' roll." She said with distaste. Her back stiffened and she quickly slammed the laptop closed before turning to her bemused boyfriend who was standing in the doorway and waved nervously.

"Hey Chuck, you're home early." She said brightly.

"So it seems." He said suspiciously, "What's going on?"

"Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" Serena said quickly. "Why, what do you think is going on?"

Chuck's eyes narrowed and he zeroed in on his girlfriend giving her a pointed glare.

Blair sighed, "Brainiac here eloped with some random boyfriend when she was nineteen and she's waited until now to spill the beans."

"Blair!" Serena cried.

"Sorry, but lying to Chuck and lying to everyone else are two very different things." Blair shrugged. "Besides, he can help. When he... you know, finishes laughing."

He held up his hands in apology to the very stressed Serena as he met Blair's eyes and the two of them started laughing again.

"Guys!"

"Sorry," They both chorused, albeit insincerely.

"So how are we going to do this?" Serena asked a few minutes later. "Chuck?"

"Uh uh, I'm not helping." Chuck shook his head. "This," he indicated the two girls and the open computer screen, "Is not my problem."

"Then why did you bother interfering!" Serena moaned.

"I thought Blair was in trouble," He shrugged. "I don't care about _your_ problems." He kissed Blair's head before grabbing his cell and leaving the apartment.

"Yeah, love you too _Bro_!" Serena shrieked after him. "Stop laughing!" She begged Blair.

**--**

"What time are Blair and Serena supposed to be meeting us?" Eric asked his brother later that night.

"Seven, but I'd say they might be late." Chuck smirked back, "They're having a little trouble with the marriage license."

"Oh?" Dan frowned. "I thought Serena had sorted that out ages ago."

Chuck just raised an eyebrow and smiled mysteriously to himself.

"So... How's things with you and Blair?" Dan asked as he drummed his fingers absently on the counter a few minutes later.

"None of your business." Chuck retorted. "We're not friends Humphrey. I only put up with you because Blair insists on being friends with Serena."

"Good, good." Dan said, not really listening. His eyes kept veering towards the doorway in search of his fiancé.

Chuck's back stiffened. Nobody ignored Chuck Bass, especially not Brooklyn nobodies with middle class status. "Actually I'm thinking I might dump her. I'm starting to have a fondness for blonds."

"That's nice." Dan smiled.

Eric snickered.

"And you know it's not just any ordinary blonds, I like them mature, tall, _pregnant_." Chuck continued.

"Really? Sounds great."

"I always have been a family man," Chuck mused. "It's really not right of me to abandon my secret lover now that she's having my baby. Of course she is engaged, but the fiancé is so delusional that he actually thinks he's the father. Some people are idiotic like that."

Eric almost choked on his drink he was laughing so hard, but still Dan wasn't paying attention. "I know, right?"

"She and I have come to some sort of arrangement, because she's already married I'll of course be permitted to take as many wives as I want. Purely in the spiritual sense of course." Chuck rolled his eyes at his future brother-in-law's stupidity. Eric, although not understanding part of the joke, knew better then to ask.

"Of course." Dan stood up and waved the two girls over when he eventually spotted them. "Hey, there you were. I was starting to get worried."

"Oh we had some last minute things to do," Blair waved off, sitting down next to Chuck and giving Eric, who was still in hysterics, a weird look.

"Yeah, Chuck mentioned something about a marriage license?" Dan frowned.

Blair's eyes widened.

"He did, did he?" Serena trilled nervously, shooting Chuck a look of pure loathing. "And what else did Chuck mention?"

Eric laughed even harder and Dan looked around at the table. Both Serena and Blair had guilty looks on their faces, Eric's head was on the table and his body was shaking with silent mirth, and Chuck... well he had his smug 'I know something you don't know' fixed firmly in place as per usual.

"You know what?" He said finally. "I don't think I want to know."

**--**

"So how did you get Serena off the hook?" Chuck asked as he and Blair rode home in their limo later that night.

Blair smiled, "Turns out that their priest was a con-artist who never even thought of getting ordained. The whole thing was a scam."

"She must be relieved." Chuck said unconcernedly.

Blair nodded. "It worked out in the end. No thanks to you." She shot him a pointed look.

"It's her problem, not mine." Chuck told her. "Let Serena work her own life out for a change."

"And if it was me who needed help?" Blair challenged.

Chuck rolled his eyes. "Waldorf not only would you never in a million years be stupid enough to do something like that no matter how inebriated you were, you would have sorted this out years ago. Most likely the day after it happened. But," He conceded, "If you ever were in trouble you already know that I'd do anything to get you out of it."

She beamed and kissed him firmly on the lips. "That's exactly what I wanted to hear."

"Oh I know." He assured her.

"What was that?" Her eyes flashed.

"I said, I think it's starting to snow."


	9. Blurting: It's a real illness you know!

**A/N - I know how late this is and I wish I could tell you that the next one will be up soon, but the internet is down in my house for a while (ANNOYING!) and I can't post or review or read anything. I'm using a friend's Laptop to do this. So if I'm reviewing your fic, sorry but I can't give you any feedback till they fix it. I can't even read it 'cause I can't get on my phone. **

**Anyways, thanks to everyone who R&R'd. I'll try and get back to you ASAP!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. (whoops, i forgot this until now!)**

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Chuck's hand clenched around his scotch glass. "He's flirting with her."

Nate peered over his shoulder and saw Blair with James Sorrentine, a member of the board of trustees for Bass Industries and Chuck's arch rival. "Yeah, he is." He agreed.

Chuck glared at his best friend. "Not helping Nathaniel."

"Does he know she's yours?" Nate asked.

Chuck shook his head. "He's new, he's only been on the board for a few weeks. Ever since his father retired."

"Well then go tell him. Mark your territory." Nate clapped Chuck on the back.

Chuck snorted, "Because Blair would really appreciate that. Look at her," He indicated her general direction, "She's completely oblivious to him." He frowned as Blair turned away and that jerk recaptured her attention.

"Did he just...?" Nate asked in shock, watching as Sorrentine dragged Blair onto the dance floor and started to grind on her. Blair carefully moved away from him and started to look around for people she knew.

"I'll kill him." Chuck ground out.

"I'll help." Nate agreed.

"Sorrentine!" Chuck barked, storming over to them and wrapping his arms protectively around Blair. "I see you've met my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?" Sorrentine asked nervously.

"Yes, like I told you three times." Blair said irritably. "Put me down Tarzan, I'm fine." She told Chuck.

Nate stifled a snicker as Chuck grabbed Blair's hand before she could disappear again. "Stay." He warned.

"What are you like his pet?" Sorrentine asked Blair as she halted. "Do you always do what he tells you?"

"Do you still let Mummy dress you?" Blair retorted saccharine sweetly as she dragged Nate and Chuck back to the bar where Serena was giggling.

"Remind me to fire his ass." Chuck snapped.

"You can't. He's a trustee, and his father is a big investor." Blair told him as she ordered a soft drink and swapped it with Serena's glass of 'tonic water'. Serena at least had the sense to look guilty as Blair took a large gulp, wincing as the Vodka hit the back of her throat.

"Well then because he's such an asset to the team," Chuck said sarcastically, "I'll have him transferred. I hear Australia is a big country for convicts." He mused.

"Doesn't your Uncle Jack live there?" Nate asked.

"My point exactly." Chuck gave Blair a reproving look as another of the board members waved he and Nate over. "Try not to get molested by anymore of my team? I really can't afford to have anymore framed or shipped out." He said dryly.

-

-

-

Blair smirked.

"At least guys are hitting on you," Serena complained morosely a few minutes later. "They've been giving me a wide berth all night. It's as if they can sense that I'm pregnant."

Blair laughed. "We're talking about the most moronic species on earth, Serena; males. I highly doubt that they have a sixth sense.

Serena frowned as she placed her hands on her still flat stomach. "I'm not starting to show am I? Because it's not even been three months yet and the doctor said at least five."

"No Serena, you are not starting to show." Blair said patiently. "And the doctor said that given Lily's size when she was pregnant with you, you probably won't show at all until month six. Which is why we scheduled the wedding for Spring."

"Well then what is it?" Serena demanded before pausing, "Wait... I don't have a sign on my back saying something like 'baby on board' do I? Because I totally wouldn't put it past Dan-"

"Serena!" Blair interrupted, raising her voice. "You are being ridiculous. Nobody, and I mean nobody, knows that you are PREGNANT!"

A hush fell over the room and Blair froze. "Crap."

"They. Do. Now. _Blair_." Serena said through gritted teeth, giving her the evilest glare that she could muster up.

Blair gave her an apologetic look as conversation started up again. Serena crossed her arms across her chest and gave Blair a pointed look.

Blair turned to the bemused bartender. "Two G&Ts please." Serena cleared her throat and Blair winced. "Better make them doubles. I'm gonna need the extra alcohol for when Humphrey finds out."

-

-

-

"Blair certainly knows how to make an impression on people," One of Bart's oldest friends remarked to Chuck with a fond smile on his face.

Chuck laughed, "You say impression, I say scene." Chuck watched as Blair groveled. "She'll say 'tete-a-tete', and lecture me about eavesdropping."

"She reminds me a lot of Misty," He remarked. "Of course Blair is a little more assertive then your mother ever was."

"Oh?" Chuck asked.

"When Miss Waldorf here wants something, she'll do anything in her power to get it. I've grown to know her in these past five years, and not once has she shirked away from making her opinions known. Even if nobody else agrees with her, she'll always get her way and it will always come out in her favor." The old man praised.

"Misty, well, she was a little more subtle. If she ever had an opinion about something, she'd plant a seed in Bart's mind. Then, little by little, she'd feed and nurture that seed until Bart had one of his famous 'brainstorms', and took her idea for his own. He thought he was coming up with all the ingenious ideas that took the company global, when really it was Misty all along."

Chuck smiled. "It sounds like Blair alright, except she would never let me off with taking the glory."

"The anniversary is coming up."

"I know." Chuck said quietly.

"I have a need for someone to go across to London for a few months. Four, at the most. You should consider it." He patted Chuck on the back before walking away; seed firmly planted.

-

-

-

"Well that was a fun party," Blair said brightly, changing out of her gown and into a more comfortable slip. Chuck slowly undid his tie and started to unbutton his shirt.

"Are you okay?" Blair frowned as Chuck meticulously slid the buttons out of each hole. "You were pretty quiet in the limo. Usually you're trying to convince me to have sex with you." No reaction. "Chuck?"

"What... what would you say to getting away for a while?" He asked. slowly, "Leaving the city for a few months. Going someplace where nobody knows us and we don't have to pretend."

"I'd say book me a plane." Blair laughed, "Seriously though, what's up?"

"I am being serious." Chuck gave up on the shirt and sat down next to Blair on the edge of the bed. "At the party Walter Downing suggested that I head up the London branches of Bass Industries. It would take a while, but I would only have to work a few hours a day. The rest could be spent with you, exploring the city or wherever. We wouldn't just be confined to England either, we could go anywhere in Europe."

"It sounds great," Blair said carefully, "but how long are we talking here?"

"He said four months. Six, if we want to travel." Chuck seemed happier about the idea now that she wasn't totally against the idea. "You said that Eleanor wanted to look into European branches of 'Eleanor Waldorf Designs' anyway. It's the perfect opportunity."

"What about the wedding? Serena would never forgive us if we weren't there. And the baby."

"The wedding isn't until February, and the due date isn't until June. We'd be back in time for the baby, and we can fly in for the wedding."

"Chuck-" Blair took his hand. "If we leave New York now, that's not all we'd be missing."

Chuck nodded his head. "We had the ceremony for my father's fifth anniversary last year, and my mother's twenty-fifth anniversary isn't for another two. Visiting their graves in New York, or thinking about them in London, it won't really make a difference."

"You sure?" Blair asked.

He smiled at her, "Does this mean we're going."

Blair smiled back and inclined her head. "Maybe if we leave next week we can go and get settled in London, and then fly to Daddy's for Christmas like we'd planned?"

"Sounds like a plan. I'll call Walter." Chuck reached for his cell as Blair picked up her discarded dress and threw it on over her head. "What are you doing?"

Blair gave him a look. "We have a family dinner in two days, and I don't feel like announcing our leaving for six months to Eleanor, Lily, and my very hormonal, _pregnant_ best friend without reinforcements."

"Reinforcements?" Chuck looked dubious as Blair reached for her purse containing all of her credit cards.

"Reinforcements." Blair repeated. "Nobody can dismember their beloved friends and children while clutching one of a kind Dolcés'. Can they?"

Chuck thought it over. "Better throw in Valentinos' too."


	10. I Believe I Can Fly

"Oh look," Chuck grouched as the limo pulled up at the heliport only to find two limos and one town car already awaiting them. "It's the Von Trapp family."

"Be nice," Blair reprimanded mildly, patting his knee absently as she searched in her purse for her phone. "They just want to see that we get off safely."

Chuck snorted, "No Waldorf, they want to see that _I_ get off safely. You they'll try and convince to stay. I hate your family," he muttered to himself.

Blair gave him a withering look, "Chuck, sweetie, _darling_. I hate to burst your bubble but most of the people out there are related to _you_."

"Not by blood. All of my blood-family are dead." Chuck reminded her.

"Chuck," Blair sighed.

"I really hope that I never need a kidney."

"Chuck!"

"What?" He smirked. "It's true. If there's ever an accident then I'm basically screwed."

Blair gaped at him as he continued thoughtfully. "There is Jack I suppose, but he'd be more likely to watch me bleed out on the operating table."

He winced as Blair slapped him on the shoulder. Hard. "What the hell was that for?!"

"You are talking about _dying_ and _accidents_, ten minutes before we are set to leave on a plane! You know I'm terrified of flying!" Blair shrieked.

James, the driver, tactfully maneuvered the limo around in a circle, and took the lengthier route around to the airport while simultaneously pushing forward the partition.

"I said that _I'm_ screwed, you have thousands of relatives to donate crap." Chuck said defensively, rubbing his arm and scowling. "And the chances of the helicopter or the plane crashing are slim to none."

"Slim to none?" Blair snarled, "_Slim-to-freaking-none_? That's supposed to make me feel better you jackass?!" She slapped him again, this time adding extra power.

"Ouch! You know for someone so tiny you sure can pack a punch." Chuck rolled his eyes and grabbed her hands and pulled her onto his lap before she could hit him again. "Now, promise you'll stop abusing me and I'll let go."

"Abusing you?" Blair echoed incredulously.

"Bruises don't lie." Chuck said smugly.

If it was possible, she struggled more. "Damn _Bass_hole … good for nothing idiot … talking about death … I'll show him abuse in a second … Moron!" She cursed under her breath as she planted a well aimed kick at his shin.

_Some time later..._

"Goodbye Lily," Blair smiled charmingly as she hugged her goodbye. Chuck just mumbled something under his breath until Blair stomped on his toe with her heel.

"Bye Lily," he muttered dutifully.

Blair shot him a glowing smile and he glowered back at her.

"Jenny," she eyed the younger girl sternly. "I'm leaving the wedding planning up to you for the next few weeks. Serena's decorative taste isn't the best at any given time least of all when she's hormonal."

Serena made a weak mewl of protest but a pointed look from Blair shut her up.

"I think we all remember Lily's disastrous choice of bridesmaid dress for Serena, so that's her out. And Vanessa," Blair gave Nate's girlfriend an appraising look, "well let's not even go there."

"I'm really going to miss that girl," Vanessa muttered sarcastically. Nate patted her on the back comfortingly as he goodbye to Chuck.

"Mother," Blair said wearily, moving along the line. "Any last words of encouragement?"

Eleanor glared at her and Chuck stonily, "If you come back with a British accent I'm disowning you."

Chuck snickered and Blair smiled weakly, "Love you too Mom."

_Even later again..._

"I can see Big Ben!" Blair said excitedly as she peered out of the porthole.

Chuck took a long sip of his scotch before shooting a glance at the clock hanging overhead. "Waldorf we're only just passing Scotland." He explained patiently. "You can't possibly see Big Ben."

Blair flushed and pulled away from the window. "I knew that," she said.

"Hey, look on the bright side." Chuck said wryly. "We haven't crashed yet."

Blair's grip on the seat tightened and she groaned, "Bass if I promise to buy you illegal organs on the Black Market in the unlikely event of you ever being injured, will you please _shut up_!"

Chuck smirked. "I actually think Eleanor's right, I am a bad influence on you."

**Disclaimer -- Don't own. Wish I did.**

**A/N - I know, I'm terrible. The worst for ever updating stories, BUT, I am trying to be more consistant so from now on I am going to really work at getting at least three chapters of this up every week, and one or two of my new one 'Free'. All other stories are on hold until I at least get 'Free' done, but I will seriously try and get a new chapter of 'For You Anytime' up within the next week or two. **

**PS - Seriously though, how hard fluff is to write when we are getting NOTHING on the show???!!!  
**

**Thanks for reviewing! And please R+R, it really makes my day and motivates me to write more!  
**


	11. Loss of Possessions, Loss of Privileges

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl or any of the characters that I choose to portray in my stories... yada, yada, yada**

**A/N: 'Kay, next chapter up. They're officially in London, I'll describe some of the sights and tours next time but for now I just wanted to get them settled in... and fighting, ut whatever lol. Anyways, R&R! (Sorry I haven't been able to reply to each review for last chapter but I'll definitely try and catch up soon :D)**

"This is our apartment?" Blair asked, wrinkling up her nose at the soft petal colored walls and the pink floral designs on everything. "This is what you picked out."

"Yes Blair, I picked out an old Granny apartment." Chuck said sarcastically, he signaled to the driver to drop their bags on the floor and he took out his cell phone. "There must be some mistake."

Blair just sighed and tapped her foot impatiently as she waited for Chuck to sort things out.

"Well?" She asked expectantly when he hung up.

Chuck winced. "Do you want the good news or the bad news first?"

Blair narrowed her eyes. "It depends. How fond are you of certain _assets_ on your body?"

Chuck gulped. "Good news it is then. We're not staying here. My assistant has already booked us the penthouse suite in one of our hotels here."

"Okay," Blair agreed. "Now what's the bad news?"

"She also said that most of the luggage that we had flown over here got... _lost_ in translation."

"Define lost." Blair crossed her arms across her chest.

"Stolen?" Chuck ventured, eyeing his girlfriend warily. "By unknown sources?"

"You have got to be kidding me." Blair groaned. "Chuck that's our stuff! You know that I made sure to only bring the things that mattered most to us."

"I know, and I'm sorry. But we can always buy new stuff." Chuck consoled her. "It's not like we don't have the money. And we still have each other. For whatever that's worth."

Blair snorted but a reproving look from her boyfriend stopped her. She walked forward and wrapped her arms around him. "I'd still rather have my new custom made Valentino." She mumbled into his shirt.

"And I'd rather have my suit collection." Chuck smiled. stroking her hair gently and planting a kiss upon her forehead. "If I told you that Dorota was waiting for you at the hotel would it make you feel better?"

Blair nodded. "I suppose." She said sulkily.

*********

"Thank God I thought to take my jewelery with me on the jet." Blair sighed as she looked around at her now meager belongings. "Don't tell Chuck, but I would have died if I lost the Erikson Beamon necklace he gave me for my seventeenth." She looked at her faithful maid/second mother who appeared at a loss without something to clean. "What's wrong Dorota? You look sad."

"Nothing Miss Blair. I just no like to travel." Dorota told her. "What time will Mister Chuck be returning?"

Blair scowled. "Not until he catches the perpetrator if he knows what's good for him."

"Miss Blair." Dorota warned. "Loss of possessions is not Mister Chuck's fault."

"I know that," Blair said innocently. "But it is his responsibility to find out whoever stole my possessions. Failure to do so will only result in the loss of certain privileges."

"Privileges?"

Blair smirked at the maid. "I'll bet the sofa is very comfortable. Let's see if Chuck agrees."

"Chuck doesn't agree." Her boyfriends annoyed voice came from behind her.

"Well then Chuck had better have good news or else little Chuck will be very lonely for a very long time." Blair said without turning around.

"Waldorf I was on the phone with the airline all afternoon." Chuck said wearily, dropping onto the sofa and asking Dorota to get him a scotch. "They have no new leads but they assured me that they would call when they do."

"They'd better." Blair told him. "For your sake."

*********

"Blair," Chuck stood in the doorway adamantly. "I am not sleeping on the sofa. I didn't do anything wrong."

Blair placed her copy of Pride and Prejudice on the bedside table. "Have the airline called? Or the cops?"

"No." Chuck admitted.

"Then there's your answer." She smiled, folding her arms across her chest. "Goodnight Chuck."

"Forget it Waldorf." Chuck shook his head as he came further into the room. "I am not spending my first night in London on some ratty old couch."

Blair raised her eyebrows. "That 'ratty old couch' probably costs more then Humphrey makes in a month."

"And if I was Dan Humphrey I'd probably appreciate it more. But seeing as I'm with a bitchy brunette as opposed to a beautiful blonde I'm obviously not him." Chuck grouched as he got into the bed.

Blair gasped and pushed him off again. "Beautiful blonde?" She asked dangerously. "Are you saying you'd rather be with Serena?"

"I'm saying that I'm tired and jet-lagged and that I don't really want to argue with you right now." Chuck told her sharply, getting into bed and switching off the light. "Goodnight Blair."

Blair huffed before jumping out of bed and grabbing her pillow.

"B, what are you doing?" Chuck sighed as he switched the lamps back on.

"Since apparently you'd rather I be blonde and more like my best-friend, your _step-sister_, I'm going to sleep as far away from you as I can get." She hissed.

"Waldorf that's not what I meant and you know it. B! Blair?!"

*********

Blair sniffled into her pillow and furiously wiped the tears from her eyes when she felt another body applying pressure to the sofa.

"Go away Chuck." She demanded.

"Blair," His hand reached out to cup her chin and he slowly wiped the tears from her eyes with the pad of his thumb. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm not." She denied vehemently.

"Blair,"

"And anyway, so what if I am?" Blair said defensively. "My boyfriend just told me that he thinks I'm bitchy and unreasonable. And that he wishes he was with my best friend."

Chuck groaned, "That is not what I said. Trust me Waldorf, if I wanted Serena I would have had her long ago. But I didn't then, and I don't now, okay?"

Blair didn't reply.

"All this drama is really uncalled for you know," he continued wearily. "If anyone should be worried about their best friend whisking the other away it should be me."

This time Blair groaned. "Nate? You're bringing up Nate? _Again_?"

Chuck smirked, "You did almost move in with him."

Blair slapped his chest, "Only because you were acting like a jerk and refused to tell me that you loved me!"

"Well I'm telling you now, so shut up, stop crying, and come back to bed." Chuck said softly.

Blair bit her bottom lip as he helped her to her feet. "Sorry for acting like a brat," she mumbled. "I guess I'm just jet-lagged, and stressed about losing all of our stuff.

"Forget about it Waldorf, I'm used to it."

_Whack_

"Ow!"


End file.
